I often hear parents grumble about the abundance of chores around the house, but am astounded at how many families don’t require children to do chores.

Now, I didn’t have children, so that I could have little maids and chefs running around. I had them, because my maternal instinct told me that it was my primary purpose in life. Nothing else I accomplish will ever rate higher than being a mom. That said, children a part of a family unit and where I’m from, each family member chips in to keep the household running.

The children’s television show Barney made cleaning up popular for the young crowd with the annoying, yet highly effective, Clean Up song. This song inspired the preschool and elementary crowd to “do your share” of cleaning up after themselves.

Teaching children to clean up after themselves shouldn’t be considered punishment. It’s simply instilling responsibility and providing skills that will follow them for a lifetime.

When I was in grade school, teachers rewarded students who had clean workspaces. The same held true for summer camp where we earned “golden nuggets” (spray painted rocks) for working with our fellow campers to ensure that our cabins were clean. In college, we had weekly room inspections. Failure to regularly pass room inspection was punishable by eviction from the dorms. Ouch! In places of employment, clean workspaces help keep us organized and productive.

Helpful strategies for achieving chore success:

• Post a chore chart in the heart of the house (family room, kitchen, etc.) and meet with your chidren often to discuss their roles in completing household chores. Put your chores on the schedule as well, so that they can see that you, too, play a vital role in keeping the house clean.
• Do not complete your child’s chores if they decide to throw a tantrum. Doing so will send the wrong message. Instead, remind them that their help benefits the entire family; remember to praise them along the way and immediately after.
• Give your children age-appropriate chores. Don’t expect a 5 year-old to make a perfect and neat bed. Instead, praise them for doing their best. In time, they will perfect the art of making a bed to your liking. Maybe.

Need help determining age-appropriate chores? Annie Stewart of WebMD suggests the following:

Chores for children ages 2 to 3

• Put toys away.
• Put clothes in hamper.

Chores for children ages 4 to 5

Any of the above chores, plus:

• Make own bed.
• Fix bowl of cereal.

Chores for children ages 6 to 7

Any of the above chores, plus:

• Sort laundry.
• Help make and pack lunch.
• Keep bedroom tidy.
• Pour own drinks.

Chores for children ages 8 to 9

Any of the above chores, plus:

• Put away groceries.
• Vacuum.
• Make own snacks.
• Wash table after meals.
• Put away own laundry.
• Make own breakfast.
• Cook simple foods, such as toast.

Chores for children ages 10 and older.

Any of the above chores, plus:

• Unload dishwasher.
• Fold laundry.
• Clean bathroom.
• Wash windows.
• Cook simple meal with supervision.
• Iron clothes.
• Do laundry.
• Mow lawn.
• Change bed.

Remember to balance the amount and difficulty of chores with other obligations, such as homework, extracurricular activities, work (for teens), social needs, and family activities. Revisit the chore schedule periodically to determine whether or not it is effective. Talk to your children to get their input, tweak the schedule, when necessary, and be sure to announce any changes during your family meeting.

Do your children have chores? If so, are tantrums, tears, and headaches part of the routine? How do you overcome those challenges?

Let’s chat!

Love to all!

CC